“Bram Stoker’s Dracula” (Directed by Francis Ford Coppola, 1992) falls short of being even remotely enjoyable. “Dracula” starts with an extended yawn, moves to a catnap and ends in a deep snore.
The movie starts with Vlad III Draculea (Gary Oldman) slaying the anti-Christians only to come home to his sprawling, gothic castle to find his beloved Elisabeta (Winona Ryder) dead after leaping to her death once receiving a faulty letter about her fiancé’s death. The Catholic priests, one of them being Anthony Hopkins, tell Draculea that Elisabeta will not go to heaven because she has killed herself. Draculea, devastated by the news, denounces his catholic faith and crosses over to the dark, hairy and bloody vampire side.
And so the story starts with blood flowing from crosses, candles and angel’s eyes. Draculea births Count Dracula and officially becomes an undead vampire in order to reunite himself with the love of his life.
There was hope that the story would bulk up with a bounty of gore, greatness and some semi-decent acting but no, not with Keanu Reeves and Ryder leading the bill.
It’s at the point where London based attorney Jonathan Harker (Keanu Reeves) journeys to Transylvania to sign off on a real estate deal for homes in London for Count Dracula that things start to get a little too campy, lame and strange. The journey is filled with Sleepy Hallow-esque carriage drivers, evil dog-like werewolves and fiery blue flames popping up on the trail to the dark and demonic castle.
Harker’s voice echoes a letter from Dracula as he travels through the cavernous terrains of Transylvania whilst Dracula’s scheming eyes are etched in the red sky, blinking as Harker stares aimlessly at the foreshadowing letter. It’s with Harker’s blank stare that cinematic greats like “Bill and Ted” and “Point Break” start to come into the forefront of the mind and the impending doom of boredom that will inevitably ensue make the two-plus hour film seem like it will drag on for infinity; drag on it does.
Time seems to be lost once Dracula regains his youth and goes in search of Harker’s fiancé Mina Murray (Rider) who is the spitting image of his beloved Elisabeta. Everything moves at a snail’s pace once Murray and Dracula meet each other’s acquaintance and the ending never seems to come.
With myriad of characters and big name actors big things were expected of this film but the film leaves an overwhelming sense of loss and disappointment; loss for the 218 minutes of life that were wasted on the film and disappointment in the overall content within the film.
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